I love being around people, but I really enjoy spending time alone and away from everyone. I know, I know! I DID just state that I enjoy being alone! I can't think if I'm constantly going and don't take the time to reflect. Sometimes we need to take time out for ourselves. It's important for a balanced life. Being alone is a fear that many are not able to conquer. Being alone shouldn't be thought of as negative or frightening. Although, it's seen that way by many people. Most fear being without family, friends, or companionship. While it's normal to fear loneliness, while being alone, learning to enjoy it is extremely beneficial and healthy.
Over the years, I've grown a lot as a person. I've faced many tribulations, which I've conquered head on. I'm not afraid of pain or being alone. I know that I'm a complicated person sometimes, this is a fact. I grew up in the least ideal of situations, this is a fact too. I care and notice more than people realize, just another fact. I've always been extremely observant. I've also always been the person that most people forget about. Of course, I could be imagining that. I'm not sure, maybe it's partially my fault because I tend to fade into the shadows at times. Is it really that odd to want - to need - to take a break from everyone and retreat for a period of solitude? I don't find it to be so peculiar.
Apparently, I don't handle situations in the same manner as the majority of the population. In the past, I would approach something that was bothering me and blow it out of proportion by causing a lot of unnecessary drama. I never actually took the time to reflect over the details. I was also insecure and felt lonely, when really I needed to spend some time working on myself. These days, I prefer to withdraw so I can think about things. I think a LOT! I like to put them into perspective, which I think is much better than being hateful and saying something that I don't really mean. In fact, I enjoy spending time alone on a regular basis.
Honestly, I don't believe I would be the person I am today if I had not taken the time to be alone with my thoughts. It has helped me grow as a person and become more comfortable with myself. I don't feel bad if I go to the movies or a restaurant by myself. If I have to be alone for a week, I welcome it with open arms.
Learning to be at ease with solitude takes time and confidence. However, once you learn to love and understand yourself, you won't feel the constant need to be around others or feel lonely. You'll be able to enjoy your own company, which makes time with loved ones even more enjoyable.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with being alone. I'm not saying to overlook your loved ones. Don't forget to spend some time with them too! If you need to take a break from society because it's overwhelming or you're upset, then go for it. Your loved ones may or may not understand, but they usually respect the space you've created.
I'm fine being alone because I love myself and realize that when I am alone, I can listen closely to my thoughts. It allows me to really understand and get to know who I truly am as a person. If this is something that bothers you, then maybe you should simply try it. Learn to create time for solitary walks, meditation, or other hobbies. Step out of your comfort zone. Embrace your time alone. It's extremely freeing and empowering when you become comfortable with it.
As always, thanks for reading!
~ Penelope ~
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